Thursday, October 6, 2011


Last week I went and saw the movie "Weekend" with my friend Matt. If you haven't seen the film yet I highly suggest going out and seeing it.

The Hollywood Reporter put it best as to what the film is about.

Two men fall convincingly in love over a weekend of sex and drugs.
Russel and Glen meet at a bar and have a one night stand. You can tell that Glen is really into Russel the morning after as they are saying goodbye in the hallway.

Some gay men have been there. You meet a man one night in a bar and you fall in love. That love quickly fades into reality a few days later.

I was lucky enough to meet a guy here in the City named Sam.He was here in New York on vacation last week and met him the night I saw the movie while having a nitecap with my friend. Sam and I decided to stay out for more drinks and he ended up back at my place.

When I woke up in the morning I looked at the Sam laying next to me and thought that I had hit the jackpot. A hot guy who was super into me and wanted to hang out with me.

Over the next couple days, Sam and I took New York on. I was his tour guide and every thing he wanted to do was checked off his list. During this time sharing cabs, drinks, dinners and walking around this glorious city we learned a lot about each other.

I fell. Hard. Like... really hard. Knowing that Sam was heading back home on Monday morning I tried to keep my head straight. In the end I did get hurt by this guy with a nights worth of events that led to me blackout drunk and him nowhere in sight and his luggage still at my place.

Everything happens for a reason. I am a huge believer in that mantra. Reflecting on meeting Sam and what transpired I think I know why I had such an emotional connection to this guy with only knowing him for a short period of time.

He was everything I wanted in a man. Athletic, smart, dorky, goofy, held my hand as we went walking through the MoMA and was really fun to talk with. To boot he's sexy as hell. When it all came crashing down I was hurt. I needed this hurt. Like everyone needs a bad break up to realize something about themselves.

Same picked up his stuff at my apartment. He walked in the door and before I could get a word out he gave me a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek. I apologized for what had transpired and he was incredibly gracious.

The previous night he decided to go home with another guy after spending the entire day with me, bringing his stuff over, having dinner and getting ready to go out. The guy was waiting for him downstairs in his car getting ready to take Sam to the airport. The guy was a means to an end. He needed a free ride to the airport and took him up on the offer. Does it still hurt... yeah. I know I will get over him. I know I will move on and find someone else.

Summer was a fantastic time. I went on a bunch of dates with different guys. Nothing worked out because these guys were just not the right fit and that's ok. What I do know is that I learned more about myself from Sam than I ever imagined.

Now I just need to sleep and focus on one thing at a time. Firstly... I'm focusing on me and what I want right now because frankly... I have no fucking clue.


  1. Do you mean he stayed with a friend that night, or went to hook up with another guy so he could take him to the airport? If it's the second one, that's pretty fucked up- I'm sorry! Been following your blog for a few years now, also currently in NYC so it's cool to recognize some of the places you talk about (I work near Boxers, for example). Good luck finding out what you want, I'm trying to do the same!

  2. Yeah. It was really fucked up. But it was my fault for falling for a tourist. Looking back on it... I was an idiot and a friend warned me about it. I decided to get over it quickly and have gone on a date earlier this week and am dressed for another date right now.

  3. I think we have all been there. NYC is full of all types of guys so finding the right one takes awhile.

    Glad to see you writing again!

  4. @WTWTG Thanks bud. There are a lot of fish in the sea and it takes time to meet that one amazing one that is still single out there. I have hope. Don't mind the bumps along the way.